I don't know a whole lot about football...

 

 This much I do know!

Boob job gone awry!! or yes, we are idiots

What won't he do for love... :)

David loves Paige and here is proof!!!!

Hundreds of ticket holders left out in the cold - ksl.com

Missin' you.

Sat at the airport, waiting for my cousin Andrew to come home from his mission. A lot of soldiers passed by, off on Christmas leave, I guess. Impressive young men, the kind that shake your hand firmly, look you in the eye, hold their chin up and stand straight. Most of them I didn't know, two of them, Joe and Jared, I did. I could see that they were different somehow. Different than those who milled around them. I used to know others like them. Used to know Jeremy Long but he's dead now. And JR Szabo, he may as well be dead, for I'll never see him again. What a shame. What a damned, damned shame. To love someone so intensely, love them like you love your own kin,  and then suddenly they're gone from you forever... too many people know just exactly what I mean. I can't see a soldier, a marine, a sailor to this day, and not think about Jeremy and JR. A bullet to the chest killed Jeremy. I'm not sure to this day what got JR. I wonder if I'll ever meet another fine man, one who looks me in the eye, shakes my hand firmly, stands with his shoulders squared and  chin up, and not think about my soldiers, my heroes, my fighters, my loved and my lost...

 

Jeremy

Thought about you today, boys. Miss you something fierce.

Dude at the airport

There was a guy at the airport who was waiting for his girlfriend. He looked good, smelled good, and he had a bouquet of roses in his hand. I secretly hoped that she wouldn't show up, so dude would turn to me and say, "Hey, so chick never showed... how about a movie?"
But alas, she showed up, and took took the roses with her.

Playing Make-Believe

I would like to announce to those who say that we all have to grow up someday....

That playtime is just for kids...

Playtime is alive and well.

I continue to settle the prairie and am kidnapped by wild Indians somewhat frequently.

I'm on the lookout for the Cowboy or Yankee Soldier who'll come rescue me. Any day now, I'm sure...

I LOVE MY LIFE

With my several serious colleagues

Hot and Spicy

Went on another hike today. Hiked up a mountain for a good what, two-three hours, mostly through snow or deep mud. It was so much fun. We didn't actually know that we were going to be hiking when we al bundled off into the vans, but I suspect that this was part of Kristi and Nate's secret winter survival platform. So up the mountain I went, in my waterproof-but-definately-not-hiking boots. On the way up the snow was hard-packed and very icy, which is not very fun for snowball fights. I was very tempted to throw a few anyhow, but decided to refrain until we started back down. We were going to hike to 'the caves' but after about two hours the students rebelled against the leaders and we started back down.
I was excited because now I was hoping to start a snowball fight. Sadly, I had recently relinquished my rights to hit Nathan because he had forced me into a truce earlier that morning. So I threw a few a Moe and Kenyan, which was pretty fun until Kenyan ambushed me. Then I made the grave mistake of hitting Scott. He tackled my down into the snow, and got snow all in my ears and down my neck. And I was forced to flee down the mountainside to escape his wrath. I literally ran down 3/4 of the entire muddy, slippery, slushy mountain. It was very intense.
I can't believe that I made it down an entire mountainside without falling but later that day I was running across a stupid FIELD and I ate it so bad. I hit the ground and rolled! Chase did too, tho, so I don't feel TOO stupid.
Later that day, still covered in mud from my recent tumble in the mud, we took a little trip into Broulims. I was pretty hungry and as I looked around, just about everything looked tasty. I decided to buy some cheezits. Hot and Spicy kind. Along came Nathan. He decided to buy some cheezits too.
"I'll think I'll get the plain ol' plain kind," he said, "'Cause I'm a plain kinda guy."
Which I suppose makes me Hot and Spicy. Even covered in mud. Oh yeah.

Show me the Money!! (or, lessons back home from one who would know)

'Cause I don't believe you got any! I just had an epiphany. You actin' like you got pockets full of it, but it's just a frickin' front! Talk about money, play like you got money, you're close to being obsessed with money, BUT YOU GOT NO MONEY!!!  I was talkin' to Ryan the other day, and he was teasing Shannon that her boy had no money, and gave reasons that maybe he didn't, and I realized that I know somebody who fits that picture. You maybe on a quest to get some money, but we all know that if you're not born with it, you're probably not ever gonna get any! Baby, I don't think you're penniless, maybe not even just poor, just a little tight on cash... that's what I think! Just a little tight on your cash honey....


and we all know i'm not talking about money

Pleasant Grove Disturbia

Working HARD at school

Tell me your major is better than mine

And listen to me laugh.

Here we go again....

Remember how I said that Cherry Coke fixes all my problems? Still true.

Let's take a Vote

I am so furious and hurt. I would like to punch someone's head and sit down and cry. Should I punch him, or should I ignore it? I'd prefer the punching, but will probably settle for the ignoring.

Back at Badger

Remember those two idiots I told you about who I can't stand? Yep. Still true.
THANK HEAVEN I am going back to NV for Halloween. I couldn't bear it if I had Halloween here...
I can't wait to see Ryan, to help decorate the house for the big Monster Mash and dress my sisters up and take my little cousins trick-or-treating. I can't wait to start baking cookies to decorate, carve my jack-o-lantern, tell scary stories on the porch, and listen to Mystery Theater on the radio. It's going to be great.
But you know, before I go looking into the future and saying how great it will be then, maybe I should remember how great it really is now.
Yesterday I had a kinda hard day. It sucked, let's be honest. I ended up in the LC (my classroom kinda place... it's all very woodsy out here) crying like an idiot for half an hour. The day started out good, there was a pretty, light frosting of snow and I was SO HAPPY to be back out here in my beloved mountains. I woke up smiling, happy to be in my warm, cozy bunk, and happily I slipped on my woolen socks to tiptoe down the stairs to see if Scott was making breakfast yet. Nope, not yet. So I went back upstairs, and, remembering that Priscilla had never seen snow before, I told her to look out the window. She was so excited she started jumping and shouting, and woke everyone up. There were a few grouches from that episode, but mostly we were all cheerful. After breakfast we had a challenge to complete called Proudy's Landing. We had to swing on a rope over a barrier and onto a small platform, and fit all 18 of us on the platform. Well, we failed and we triumphed. We discovered after some trial that it was physically impossible to swing and fit us all on the platform. We managed to all fit onto the platform, but not by swinging onto it. My main goal was to make sure that everyone had a successful swing onto the platform. I knew that others would argue and buffalo about how to fit us all onto the platform, so I'd just keep out of that circus, and see to it that everyone got across. My good friend Emily was kinda nervous about it. I can relate to the nervousness she must've felt, doubts about not being strong enough to make it to the platform and looking foolish or letting everyone down. She really didn't want to do it; but I knew this was about more than a silly challenge on a ropes course. It was about how Emily viewed her ability, and how she'd feel about herself. I knew she could make it; I just couldn't let her back away. It took a good bit of talking- things like that usually do- but eventually she said she'd do it. I knew she would. !! She got up on the rope and I prayed and prayed that she'd get across like I had promised she would...1,2,3, off she swung and SHE MADE IT! Really, that was the highlight of my day.
After that we ate lunch and voted on taking the rest of the day to do homework or to go do another obstacle. I seriously was exhausted and freezing and emotionally drained - it's a long story - and just not up to it. So everyone else went to the obstacle course and I went to the LC and had a minor meltdown. Then I pretended  hadn't, gathered my homework together and started to walk back to the Lodge.

The snow was falling and I imagine I looked quite pathetic. I was having a pretty good pity party, too. Just then Scott drove by in the blue BYUI minivan. He pulled over, gave me a look, and laughed.

“You need a ride, Meagan?”

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

I helped him unpack the groceries, put them away and he gave me a soda. We joked around and played some classic rock. Then I went upstairs and fell asleep next to the fireplace.  I love Badger Creek. And I love Scott. And I love God most of all.

And just like that life was good again. It’s amazing how God can fix things so quickly and so simply.  A friend, a smile, a little love, just ten minutes of attention and I’m okay again.

Thank you God for good friends.

The Proudest Days of my Life

NEBRASKA

I was just looking at some old pics on Facebook instead of doing homework, like I usually do, and I came across some mission pics. I've seen them all before, but for some reason this time I stopped for a minute. I couldn't stop looking at my name tag. So I reached onto my shelf where I keep one of my old tags, and held it in my hand for a minute.

Sister Quirk

The Church of

Jesus Christ

of Latter-Day Saints

That name tag symbolized a year and a half of the most difficult hearbreak and the most glorious rejoicing. That name tag is a symbol of Michelle, Ashley, Bobbie, Brenda, Andy, Matthew, Darcy, JR, and lists upon lists of names of those I was so privileged to serve. It is a symbol of those I served with, the Elders who became my brothers and the Sisters who, well, I guess the name fits. :)

Thank you God for sending me to Nebraska. I hope only that I was half the blessing to them that they were to me, and continue to be every day.

Sometimes  look at these pictures and I wonder, "Did that really happen?"  It seems almost like a dream,

until I thinkof Sis. Hall, Sis. Moore, Sis. Page, Sis. Zitting, Sis Lamplugh, Elder Moore, Elder Troxell, Elder Harper, Elder Soelberg and I know that they were no dreams. They are my best friends and my brothers.

And the storms there were no dreams. I can't dream lighting that rattles the window panes or wind that seems to pass thru you like you're a chain link fence.

And the Spirit of God, like a fire is burning. That was no dream.

Thank you God, for giving Nebraska to me.

Alma 26: 8-12, 16

Paige and David ~ Engaged!!

Congratulations Lovebirds!!!

Paige and David sittin' in a tree

K-I-S-S-I-N-G

First comes EFY

Then comes meddling sisters

Then comes the Ice Caves

Then comes Trixie

Then comes a big fat ring!!

Home Teachers

The trouble with having extremely attractive roommates is when your Home Teachers come over to visit, they IGNORE every word I say. I finally got sick of it and so I just walked out. That was just rude of them. I may not be a sexy little latina with long eyelashes and long curly hair, but I'm plenty pretty and besides that, I can say intelligent things. Way to go, Home Teachers, good job. Idiots.

Dracula



When I was in 4th grade, I found a collection of books called "Classic Monsters" or something like that, in the school library. I remember looking through them and being fascinated. My favorite books were on Dracula, the Wolf Man, and the Mummy. The covers of the books were a worn, orange color with black lettering, and the pictures inside were all black-and-white stills from the movies they portrayed.

How fascinating! How terrifying! Look at the lovely girl, laying there helplessly! Where is her fiance when she needs him? I hope I am that pretty when I lay down for sleep! I wonder if Dracula will try to suck my blood! Perhaps he will not eat me like he ate Lucy. Perhaps he will kidnap me like Mina instead. He has been kown to do such things.

 You can't imagine the thrill these ideas send through an imaginative little girl. The very best part wa at the end, when Jonathan Harker saves Mina from the clutches of the count and they escape up the creepy staircase together.
Yesterday I did something I've wanted to do since 4th grade. No, I was not captured by Count Dracula. It would be very unfortunate for me if I was, since I have no dashing man to come save me in just such an event. (Any volunteers? Heehee)
I finally watched the original 1931 version of Dracula. I have never been so electrified by a movie. I knew the story backwards and forwards, I recognized all the characters immediately. I guess waiting 15 years to watch a movie makes for pretty good anticipation.
I love being a grown-up sometimes. If you want the 1931 version of Dracula, well by George, you just go and get it. And then you sit down and watch it!!
So if you want to come and visit me any time this month, be assured I will compel you to watch Dracula with me. You'll like it. I love it.

PBR shows why I have to both belittle and tip my hat to my roughstock cowboys...

Nobody died.

On a more serious note- Forgiveness, the Atonement, and what it means to me

Okay, I don't generally talk about this, but for some reason I really feel like I should tell this story, so here we go. Maybe it'll help somebody out.   Yesterday I bought a hat. It's a keep-me-warm up at Badger Creek kinda hat, with a small visor on the front. It's actually my favorite kind of hat, and it looks good on me. So I bought it and wore it home. You'll think I'm silly, but I was actually pretty proud of myself for that. You see, me and this type of hat have a history.
In 2006 I was dating a guy in AZ who always wore this kind of hat. Looked good on him, too. I'd steal it from him occaisionaly, or he'd plunk it down on my head when he saw me shiver and say, "Keep warm, girl!" It was good at first. But then he changed, got mean.
'Why didn't you leave him the first time he hit you?' I get that question sometimes.
Oh, because I 'forgave' him. (This is not real forgiveness. This is denial.) Because I'd blame myself, "I made him mad, I started it..." or because he'd beg forgiveness and I never could stay mad at him. Also 'cause I was scared to death of him.  There were lots of reasons. There always are. If it had been a sister, a cousin, a friend, I would have called her up and said, "You need to get out of there NOW. I'm coming to pick you up." Hindsight is 20/20 I guess. Eventually my Mr. Wonderful made some threats that I didn't take seriously, but I knew it was time to get out of there. I was traveling back to NV for Christmas, and I figured I'd just go and never come back. Maybe he knew, maybe he found out what I was up to. Who knows?
I was packing my bags, alone in my cabin. It was cold, snow was falling hard, and the radio was on. I saw a movement out of the corner of my eye, turned, and there he was. You can imagine what happened from there.
The good news is that I never did go back after that. Good news is that I have a strong family who love me. Good news is that about 2000 years ago Christ performed an Atonement in which he suffered for not just our sins, but also for our physical and emotional pain. Bad news is that in this life we have trials and sometimes we are asked to fight with things like Post-traumatic Stress Disorder.
I used to panic at anyting that was remotely related to the incident; Pine trees, snow, packing, being alone, darkness, certain songs on the radio, even that darn hat. Too bad, too. That was my favorite kind of hat.
How does Forgiveness tie into all this? Christ said that we are expected to forgive all men. But I didn't need to be forgiven of anything here. True.
I think that sometimes forgiveness is more for the offended than for the offender. Forgiving him was good for me. I forgive him, I do not hold a grudge against him, but that does not mean I should ever go back to him. I forgive him; I do not trust him.
If someone has hurt you, the Atonement can heal you... if you let it. Feelings of hate and shame and anger are very distructive and corrosive to a soul. Holding on to them feels empowering at first, but eventually they are just rotteness in your bones. No good. You choose to control it by letting it go, or let it control you by holding on. In the same way, you choose to let the Atonement work in your life, or you block it. You choose to act, or to be acted upon.
Doesn't mean it will be easy, however. Sometimes we are given trials, even when we have done nothing wrong. Today for example. Super embarrassing. My phone rang in class. I reached to turn it off, but couldn't find it. Looking, looking, looking and it kept ringing, ringing, ringing. Out of nowhere I felt panic creeping up, so I grabbed my whole bag and bolted out the door. If I'm going to have a panic attack I'm sure not doing it in front of the whole class, thank you. So I went to the hall and tried to get ahold of myself. I couldn't stop thinking about 2006, and anger rose with the panic.
I knew I could continue to get angrier and angerier, or I could remember to apply the Atonement and remember to forgive him. So as soon as I had gathered my wits, I went to the quiet solitude of the Wildlife Museum down the hall, and prayed, 'God, let me forgive that man. I don't want to hate him. Help me to get rid of this awful feeling.'
And He always does.
One of my favorite Hymns goes something like this:
I Believe in Christ. He is my King. With all my heart, to him I'll sing. I'll raise my voice in praise and joy, in grand amens my tongue employ. ... And while I strive through greif and pain, His voice is heard, 'Ye shall obtain.'
I know that is true. I know because I've seen it work in my life, and I continue to see it everyday. I see it in little things mostly, in buying a new hat that I like, that I don't have to panic about anymore, and I see it in the friends God gives me who text me after I run out of class and persuade me to come back.
I am so blessed.

Why my Jeep looks like the Creature from the Black Lagoon.

ICE CAVE DAY!

I love going to the Ice Caves. It is glorious fun even before you get to the actual caves. It's non-stop fun Indiana Jones adventure from the minute you turn off the main road onto the dirt road. As David and Paige know, driving on that road scares me to death. Last time I nearly killed myself and my Jeep!  You know you doin' something wrong when you nearly kill a Jeep. Fortunately for me, I have a friend named Nathan (first one in the pic) who is a really good driver. So I always recruit him when I feel the need for an excursion out there. It rained recently, so the road was filled with puddles and muddy pools which we crashed and jostled and thundered through. We'd hit a puddle and mud/dirty water would spray up the sides of the Jeep like ocean waves when they hit the surf. I couldn't stop smiling and laughing out loud. Then the ride is over, and you have arrived at the Cave!! It was the first time for Alex's Friend (sorry friend! I forgot your name. I'll make up a new one for you. George, how's George?) and it's always fun with a first timer. George and Alex and second and third in the picture. Next time I go out there, I'll bring glow-sticks and we'll use those instead of flashlights. But we'll take them out with us and not leave our trash all over the cave unlike some jerks. Leave No Trace!!

You can't tell too well in this pic, but this is where the cave drops and you have to climb around a big ice pyramid. Some kind soul put a rope there so you can easy yourself down and not die. It is great fun.



And this is at the eld of the cave. It's a steep little hill of ice that you can climb up and slide down. It makes for a glorious good time. You have to stop yourself at the end though, or you'll slide right into a little pool of ice-cold flithy cave water.

Alex, you look like you're on drugs.

At one point Alex and Nathan decided it would be so funny to attack poor little Meagan. Even George turned against me, taking pictures of my sad fate. Only Ben was the kind one who did not try to kill. me. Ben is in the back of this picture, and in the back of the first picture. Eventually I escaped.

Then came to ride back to civilization. It was very much like the first, except for one part when we decided it was a good idea to try and drive up a sheer cliff face. We discovered that was not a wise decision.

But we lived.



Small and Wise

Shannon means "Small and Wise"

And Christine means "Christlike"

You were well named, my dear

You said the other night that there is a lot we can learn from each other.

I'll always try to be someone you can learn from.

I learn from you every day, sassy girl.

Always stong, always determined, always feisty, always beautiful, always righteous.

I've always loved you.

You are a sunbeam on a rainy day, a steel rod when I'm feeling weak, and best friend all the time.

I'm so grateful God gave me a sister like you.

In honor of Wes, Nick, Tyler, Ammon and the rest of you charmers.

You better take it from me, that boy is like a disease
You’re running, you’re trying, you’re trying to hide
And you’re wondering why you can’t get free
He’s like a curse, he’s like a drug
You get addicted to his love
You wanna get out but he’s holding you down
‘Cause you can’t live without one more touch

He’s a good time Cowboy Casanova
Leaning up against the record machine
Looks like a cool drink of water
But he’s candy-coated misery
He’s the devil in disguise
A snake with green eyes
And he only comes out at night
Gives you feelings that you don’t want to fight
You better run for your life

I see that look on your face
You ain’t hearing what I say
So I’ll say it again‘Cause I been where you been
And I know how it ends
You can’t get away
Don’t even look in his eyes
He’ll tell you nothing but lies
And you wanna believe
But you won’t be deceived
If you listen to me
And take my advice
Run run away
Don’t let him mess with your mind
He’ll tell you anything you want to hear
He’ll break your heart
It’s just a matter of time

Oh you better run for your life
That last line is for you, cowboy

*Disclaimer Shannon and I are not man-haters. Just player-haters. <3

A Scientific Experiment

I recently read in a magazine article that women might be wasting their money on high heels because men don't notice when we wear heels vs when we don't. This made the pretty little wheels in my head start to turn.
Hmmmmm... I wonder.....
Experiment time! I donned a skirt and some heels and a slick pair of nylons, and drove myself on down to our local Walmart. (By the way, if you are doing a general social experiment, Walmart is an excellent place to do it. You get people of all different ages and social standing, and people are not concerned with impressing anyone at Walmart, so they act more naturally.)

So if you are wondering if guys notice when you are wearing heels, the results are inconclusive. Here are the options; either they DO notice, or wearing heels makes you look very pathetic and lonely, and so every male store clerk feels the need to come over to see if you need help, and every male shopper thinks he'd better strike up a conversation.

I swear, the next time I feel depressed, I am slapping on a pair of stilettos and escorting myself to Walmart.
"Hey there, miss. Can I help you with anything?"

"Excuse me, miss. Do you need any help?"

"You need a little help reaching that top shelf, miss?"

"Well, hey. This is the third time we've gone down the same aisle. I notice you've got Drumstiks in your cart. That's my favorite ice cream, you know."

All of this is code, by the way. Code for 'Hey there SexyLegs. I'd like to see those legs climbin' into my pickup. I'd like to take those calves out to visit my ranch. Howz about you and me have a little lip pressin' conference after class?'
In case you are wondering, the correct response to this is
 "Oh, (smile) I'm doing fine, thanks for asking. (smile again)"
 Which is also code. Code for, 'In your dreams, pal. Not even there.'
If I had better manners, I wouldn't be nearly so pleased with myself for this discovery. All in the name of science, you know. Just helping to better the world.

Skylar Nance is my homeboy

If love were only simple, I would have it every day, if love were easy to fix, I would fix it straight away. Alas the heart holds strong for she who doesn't know, why oh why do I have love that's unable to grow.
A poem by Skylar Nance
which I think is clever

Bring it

I'm going to get so teased for this one. I can deal with that.
So now the 180th Semi-Annual General Conference is over. It was a great one!! I loved to hear from everyone, especially President Eyring and President Uchtdorf. I remember as a little little girl looking at a picture of President Eyring as the newest member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles and thinking to myself, 'He looks nice. I like him.' and I've had an affinity for him ever since. Same thing with elder Uchtdorf~ the minute I laid eyes on him, I thought, 'I like him.' So you can imagine how happy I was when President Monson called them to the First Presidency.
They both gave great sermons. Pres. Uchtdorf made me laugh so hard with his 'what does that have to do with flying an airplane?' joke. And it was interesting to me, because he started off with an analogy about tree rings. In school I have an Environmental Stewarship class and we learned about tree rings and tree cores recently. But the best talk (okay, my favorite talk) of Conference was Elder Holland's sermon on Saturday Morning. It really almost moved me to tears. I don't do that a lot. I hate it when people judge how 'spiritual' you are by how much you cry during sacrament meeting, so I try to err on the side of Scrooge rather than the former. Not that I think crying is a sure sign of weakness; look at Pres. Eyring. He tears up frequently. Anyhow, I was very affected by what Elder Holland said. He really put a lot of things into perspective. I felt like he was talking right to me. One really amazing thing about Conference is how the Holy Ghost can bear witness to you about things very personal during the sermons. I have so much peace in my heart about my mission and my second Mission President, President Kunz, with whom I've had a hard time being reconciled with because of some differences. And I am so grateful for my excellent parents, with whom I do not always see eye to eye, but whom I recognize gave it all they've got.
And then there was Elder Christofferson's talk about Consecration (amazing) President Uchtdorf's on Simplicity, President Eyring's on Trust in God, and Elder Mervyn Arnold's on the Name of Christ which I cannot wait for the Ensign to come out and to go through again.
Okay, family. Go ahead and heckle me and tell me I'm Molly Mormon. What's so bad about that anyways?

General Conference on a Saturday morning.

"Saturday Morning? Who do you think I am, a 7th-Day Adventist? We are Mormons!"
That was the general train of my thoughts this morning as I woke up from an uncomfortable sleep much earlier than I wanted to. I could smell the eggs cooking upstairs and which meant bad news for me, since my sisters future in-laws apparently don't know I'm allergic to the breakfast they're making. I know what is going to happen next; they'll suggest that I just have some cold cereal, which I also cannot have since I'm allergic to milk. GAH!! Not a promising beginning to a good morning. So I rolled out of bed with a pounding head, and trudged to the bathroom, looked in the mirror, and stopped.
"What are you doing, crazy?" I wondered to myself. "Remember on your mission you used to be so excited for Conference. Why are you so cranky? You love this 'churchy stuff'. And it's probably just what you need."
So I quickly showered, curled my hair and went upstairs. It was easy to find a breakfast I could stomach, and the happy attitude made me almost excited to watch Conference. David, Paige's boyfriend, was friendly and jovial, and confided to me that he happened to know a secret about Conference. He's interning for the Ensign, and he said that 5 new temples would be announced, but would not reveal where.
So we evetually all sat down and squashed together on the couch and watched as it came on.
You know, this experience happens not infrequently, but it never fails to amaze me. As I started to take notes on the various talks, I felt like they were intended just for me. I suddenly had answers to problems I've been struggling with, happiness where I had headache, and gratitude where I had grouchiness.
Gosh I love this Gospel, and how lucky I am that there are still more sessions to go.

My push-up bra will help me get my man

This woman is CRAZY!!! Gurrrlllll, I be lovin your new Kool-aid herr!

20% Highly Responisve

I like life on fast forward. Except for school on fast forward, 'cause all that is is classes periods that are twice as long as normal and so much homework that you'll never get it all done unless you get real creative.  But you know, I hate standing still. I'd much rather have too much on my plate than too little. If I don't have anything to do, I'll invent things to do. Sometimes I'll get a really good idea that ends up in the ruination of several minor European countries.
Gimme gimme more gimme more...
Oh, Britney. Such a good role model. Hit me baby one more time.
Today should keep me on my toes. FDSCI 101 until 12:15, then FDREL until 3:00 and then homework will easily take me until 7:30 when Hip Hop starts, and that'll run into Country Dancin' where I'll go teach Slannen to dance (and hopefully Darwin will be there to dance with me since he's one of the few guys who will actually DANCE with me... he's so much fun. Hooray for Darwin, who used to be Elder King, and that's how I know him. It's funny dancing with someone you used to know as a missionary). Then it'll be 10:00 and time to go home and get ready for bed since I'm trying to break myself of energy drinks and getting 3 hours of sleep is not the way to accomplish that goal. Energy drinks are pretty interesting.
(Just as a random side note, there are two people who I hate a lot. One is Natalie, I told you about her, and the other one is Erik, her bf. I hate them.)
Anyhow, energy drinks are both a godsend and a huge vice. They are getting me through these three-hour classes pretty well, and I'm getting better grades because if them, I am certain of it. If I'm not fighting just to stay awake, I can pay much better attention. More attention = better grades. I'm highly responsive to stimulants. And I don't mean just energy drinks. If you want a reaction from me, it's not overly-difficult to get it. Now, I may not show you what I'm thinking or feeling, but odds are in your favor if you wanted to make me so angry I'd like to punch your lights out, ya did. But here's the hard part. I won't. Well, sometimes I will. But not nearly as often as I'd like. So if I've ever socked you a good one, know that I've probably wanted to do that much more frequently.
You know, I'd like to take a poll. Who thinks I care too much...hang on... I was just about to take a poll from other people, to see if I care too much what other people think. Something is wrong with that picture.
I have this theory. You know how redheads are 20% more perceptive of pain than other people? Maybe that's my deal. I'm 20% more likely to deck you than most other people, possibly because I'm 20% more angered by your snide remark which hurt my feelings 20% more than you anticipated because you are a blonde/brunette so you don't know about this 20% thing. Logically this leads me to assume that someday I'll fall 20% more in love 20% faster than the average blonde/brunette 23 year old, to someone 20% better-looking than your average hottie.
Unfortunately experience leads me to want to place my money elsewhere. I never love nobody fully, always one foot on the ground. But, like I said, I'm highly responsive. Convince me. (I'm talking to you, Jeff Watkins!! Just kidding, just kidding...)

Start breathing again...

I'm feeling blue. Heather Maschman said that when I feel blue, I should start breathing again. Why is it that when I feel sad, I listen to sad music? Doesn't that just compound the problem? Maybe I'm just trying to comfort myself that someone else is quite worse off than myself. Which is true. I can make an extensive list of people who are worse of than myself. Truth be told, I am very blessed and very happy.  But I do indulge myself in moments of lonliness. So may I propose a toast; let's all toast to life. A toast to the loniless that teaches us the delicious beauty of good company, the broken heart that teaches us to appreciate when hearts are full, to tears of disappointment that run down our cheeks which make us appreciate the lovely warmth of a blush of pleasure, and to the absence of arms around us that teaches us to walk by our own strength. A toast to life even in it's low spots, and a toast to God who in his infinate wisdom and mercy, has given travail to the sons of men, so that we will grow stronger by them.
And now what do we do? Well, I'll turn off the blue tunes and crank the Cowboy Troy. Maybe I'll go play chicken with a train... ;) I know I'll have to fake the happy, force the happy for a little while, but I'll be fooling everyone else, and soon it'll to the Hamlet thing: faked at first, then gradually it becomes true.
And in the meantime, I'll think of my favorite things. 1.Batman, my beautiful Arabian horse who never lost a race. 2. Papa Dan 3. Conquering the Wild West with Andy. 4. Off-roading in my jeep. 5. My sister Shannon, who gets my humor. 6. My best buddies, elders from my mish. 7. Dancing. 8. Pretty dresses that bounce as I walk. 9. White water rafting trips I get credit for. 10. Honestly, the Book of Mormon. I thank God for that book.
See there, I'm starting to breathe again.

Praise God and Pass the Cherry Coke

"She just said Coke! I thought she was a Mormon!!"
She is. And she is enjoying her Cherry Coke right now. You know, I've come to the conclusion, that if I've got a Cherry Coke, I can conquer the world. Loads of homework from Professor Carter? Pound a Coke and see if that pile of papers doesn't look like downright FUN. Oh yeah Quantum Theory bring it. Oh yeah good-looking guy across the room from me bring it. Oh yeah ex-bf who I just found out is currently married to the chick he cheated on me with and is also currently attending the same school as me bring it. I got a Cherry Coke. What Now!!?? That's what I thought! Walk away, just walk away.
"Meagan... you are sounding a little rebellious again..."
Oh, I am not. I am sounding like a perfectly normal, intelligent human being who isn't over-obsessed with being one of those amazing plastic people with amazing plastic smiles and fake hearts and fake lives and fake devotion to God their Father. Okay, that was a little harsh. I'm a little quick to bite on that subject 'cause I've got this friend who looks pretty perfect. This person appears to have it all; we all know one. Good looking, got money, got a car, got members of the opposite sex all over them, loves church and goes to the temple all the time. I really like this person and want to be their friend. But I get the feeling all the time that this person judges me really harshly, judges everyone harshly. I hope I'm wrong. But the more I get to know this person, the more I think, 'Crap. You're not an amazing plastic person, are you?'
"Meagan... so you got problems. We all got problems. Enough of the problems, okay?"
Haha, okay deal. Wait, problems? You got problems, I got Cherry Coke.
Take that, amazing plastic people.

Green Eyes In Africa Trailer

My thoughts on the subject friends, boyfriends, exes and break-ups.

So, as most of you who read my blog are aware, I recently broke up. Even the best of break-ups SUCK, and this one wasn't the best kind. (Spoiler alert, this will not be a detailed account of Meagan's break-up, so if that's what you're after, today is not your lucky day.) But luckily for me, Tad (real name changed)  is a really great guy.
"If he's so great, why aren't you dating him, Meagan?"
Good question. Great question actually. I think that Tad sometimes thinks that I thought he wasn't good enough for me. That isn't true at all. It's not a matter of 'good enough'. Tad's certainly 'good enough'. But he's just not right for me. It's like when you're fixing to buy a horse. I'm a long-distance racer. I'm gonna be looking into Arabians, maybe Thoroughbreds, and a few other breeds can suprise you in their stamina. One day at a fair, I see this incredible Belgian. The most beautiful Belgian, perfect in every way it should be. I can't resist going over to give him a try. He's amazing. But the more I try him out, the more I know that he's not right for me. He's strong and lovable. But he can't run a 200 mile race, and I need a racer. Keeping him to myself is selfish, because out there somewhere is someone looking hard for the perfect Belgian. Doesn't mean he's not good enough. Doesn't mean I'd ever change a thing about him. He might be the finest Belgian in the state. But I'm looking for an Arabian. So now I'm off, looking for that perfect horse again, but that doesn't mean I'll forget that wonderful Belgian.
The real trouble some in the fact that people aren't like horses. Horses can love to a degree, can feel loyalty to a certain point, but people can feel it much more. The awful, tragic part is that when Meagan realized she wasn't looking for a 'Tad', she suddenly saw that Tad was looking for a 'Meagan'. (At least Tad is convinced he wants a Meagan. I still think he'd be better off if he at least gave try to a, oh... say... 'Kalie'. Ahem.)  And there is no easy way put of that. Trust me, I tried hard to find a way out that didn't involve Tad getting hurt.
So now we're 'friends from afar', as per his request, since being around me is no longer healthy for him, he says. I hold out for the hope that we can be friends again one day. We started out as friends, after all. Who thinks that's possible? Can you go back to being 'just friends'? I always thought you could. I can't think of a single ex who I wouldn't love to give a big hug to if I saw them again, just as a good friend. (w/ the exeption of the one who is currently in the pen) 
Can guys and girls be 'just friends' at all, in reality? I've been called naive for this one, too. To my guy friends: are we legit friends, buddies, pals, or are the other reasons that we hang, that you've got my back? You secretly been givin' me the sneaky up-down look? Hahaha, no that thought is just too ridiculous. Well, maybe Skylar Nance has, but that's all. Just kidding, Skylar. Just playing.

The only person on my good side is Mother Teresa.

I am so cranky right now. It is hilarious. I have a hard time being truly, seriously cranky. I just start laughing in the middle of it all.
Hey, so shout out to my FDAM professor~ Hey! Bite me you facist paper nazi!!!
Yeah. I actually wrote him an email today. I wasn't very happy. How about I copy it here and we take a we start placing bets on how soon Meagan gets chucked out of class. Here it is:

Dear Professor Lewis,

Thank you for the sample assignment. I think that it is just what I need to make sure I get the format right. You are very strict about that particular detail, so I know it must be important to you. I will be sure to get it right from here out.

However, I am affronted that you immediately assumed that I was trying to be sneaky. My introductory material was wider spaced than it was supposed to be, and I was frustrated by this as you apparently are. I could not get it to co-coperate, and I'm not a Computer Science major. You appear to be very comfortable being frank with us, so I hope you don't mind my returning the sentiment.

Thank you again for the solution to our problem. May I suggest sending the Sample Assignment out BEFORE your classes start in the future, instead of a lengthy and confusing description that 85% of your students failed to understand, and scathing reviews afterwards.

Sincerely,

Meagan Quirk

To his credit, I just got a very nice email back from him. So he appartenly is a better person than I. Big shocker.

I am laughing so hard about all of this. I can't believe myself sometimes. The things I do, I swear. Like the time I erased Justin Zuniga's call from what's-her-names cell phone so she'd think he hadn't called. That was so stupid, so messed up. And so hilarious.

So it's gonna be one of THOSE days, huh? Well, alright then.

My belly hurts!!!! Probably from eating my roommates bread dough. Dough never sat well with me, really. Also probably because I failed to ASK for permission to eat the dough, so this is the natural consequence of theivery. Dang it. I do not enjoy feeling sick. The only good thing about being sick is when people find out you're sick, they are nice to you. Sometimes you even get chicken soup and ginger ale. I don't know that chicken soup or ginger ale have actually ever cured me of any disease, but it's not as if I'd ever object to them either. Who started this whole chicken soup business? Why don't we bring chocolate cake and Coca-cola? I will definately not be turnin' down me some chocolate cake and Coke. Just the sound of that is making me feel better.
'Gah, I feel so sick.' says Meagan
'Oh no, really?' says her friend
'Yeah. I think I'll throw my guts up and die.'  whines Meagan
'Well, dang. I was gonna invite you over for chocolate cake and Coke.' says her friend, smiling to himself because he read Meagan's blog and now knows how to bribe her and exactly how she'll react.
'Eh? What what? Chocolate cake? Coke? I suppose I might be able to manage the teensiest morsel.' says Meagan, not realizing she walked RIGHT INTO HIS PALM.
Now, in retrospect, I can see how this all happens. But at the time, I'm just walking along on my little sunbeam, temporarily forgetting about all the sneakiness in this world. That's sort of me in my natural state: happily walking to class, lost in my own little redheaded thoughts, oblivious to anyone around me who isn't fitting into my mental charade of movie-stardom.
Anyone ever read "The Color Code"? No, that is not like "The DaVinci Code". Well, if you have, I am a Yellow Blue. I'm guessing I'm 65% Yellow and 35% Blue. Anyhow, what that means is that I like fun. I am motivated by fun. "It'll be fun..." is the most tempting phrase on earth. I have gotten into a great deal of trouble on the grounds of fun and attempted fun. So worth it. :) You want to know why I chose to come to Earth after the great council in Heaven? No earthly trial = no progression = no more fun. You know why I don't want to go to Hell? Heaven sounds like more fun. Guess why I don't like to do bad things. Cause then I feel guilty, I feel bad. Feeling bad + feeling guilty = totally cramping the style of fun. Can't have fun when you're feeling guilty for being a jerk/ cheating on a test/ teasing nerds/ robbing a bank or whatever. You know, sometimes it's a bad thing, but it's really a good thing sometimes. Let's say that one night I wanted to have some fun, and going to the club with my sexy boyfriend sounded pretty tempting. Well, chances are I'd end up going. At first it would be fun. I'd be dancing with a guy who digs me and I'd be feelin' like a million bucks...but in about half an hour, I start feeling a little guilty. "Hmmm..." I wonder, "What is this very non-fun feeling? I think  it's coming from the blasting obsenities and scantily clad crowd. You, know, I suspect I am being bad. Hmm, so being bad = feeling bad = no fun. Time to bounce!!" By the way, there's a scripture about that. "Behold, I say unto you, wickedness never was happiness" Alma 41:10.  That, translated into Yellow, says "Behold, I say unto you, wickedness is a fun sucker."
I am so random.