A Scientific Experiment

I recently read in a magazine article that women might be wasting their money on high heels because men don't notice when we wear heels vs when we don't. This made the pretty little wheels in my head start to turn.
Hmmmmm... I wonder.....
Experiment time! I donned a skirt and some heels and a slick pair of nylons, and drove myself on down to our local Walmart. (By the way, if you are doing a general social experiment, Walmart is an excellent place to do it. You get people of all different ages and social standing, and people are not concerned with impressing anyone at Walmart, so they act more naturally.)

So if you are wondering if guys notice when you are wearing heels, the results are inconclusive. Here are the options; either they DO notice, or wearing heels makes you look very pathetic and lonely, and so every male store clerk feels the need to come over to see if you need help, and every male shopper thinks he'd better strike up a conversation.

I swear, the next time I feel depressed, I am slapping on a pair of stilettos and escorting myself to Walmart.
"Hey there, miss. Can I help you with anything?"

"Excuse me, miss. Do you need any help?"

"You need a little help reaching that top shelf, miss?"

"Well, hey. This is the third time we've gone down the same aisle. I notice you've got Drumstiks in your cart. That's my favorite ice cream, you know."

All of this is code, by the way. Code for 'Hey there SexyLegs. I'd like to see those legs climbin' into my pickup. I'd like to take those calves out to visit my ranch. Howz about you and me have a little lip pressin' conference after class?'
In case you are wondering, the correct response to this is
 "Oh, (smile) I'm doing fine, thanks for asking. (smile again)"
 Which is also code. Code for, 'In your dreams, pal. Not even there.'
If I had better manners, I wouldn't be nearly so pleased with myself for this discovery. All in the name of science, you know. Just helping to better the world.